After a brief (long) hiatus, I'm going to start blogging again. And to start, a link to Johnson's site:
http://www.hopeless-empty-abyss.com/
Enjoy.
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
Monday, September 22, 2008
Ike resistant toilet paper
After your next big category 5 hurricane blows through that porcelain kingdom you call your own, think about this new toilet paper: 3-ply! Yup, thats right. The toilet paper barons are taking a marketting note straight from the razor companies - just keep adding more of the same and profit!
Here's the link:
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/odd3_ply_toilet_paper;_ylt=Ave4qfv8w.CJ5JCAsIpDares0NUE
"The company touts the toilet tissue as "ultra-soft" and says it plans to market the product to women 45 and older who view their bathroom as a "sanctuary for quality time.""
Don't worry, they have a version with ninja turtles on it to try and corner the 18-35 male demographic (TMNT really? no)
Goerge Castanza would be shocked.
Here's the link:
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/odd3_ply_toilet_paper;_ylt=Ave4qfv8w.CJ5JCAsIpDares0NUE
"The company touts the toilet tissue as "ultra-soft" and says it plans to market the product to women 45 and older who view their bathroom as a "sanctuary for quality time.""
Don't worry, they have a version with ninja turtles on it to try and corner the 18-35 male demographic (TMNT really? no)
Goerge Castanza would be shocked.
Poll Results: I would go to Church if...
Well, normally I don't post results when NOBODY VOTES... but given the nature of the question it seems appropriate. And the answer? Nobody will go to church no matter what perks you offer them. Amen to that brotha!
Q: I would go to Church if...
0: The priest sold me cocaine
0: I could smoke blunts in the pews
0: They had internet and were down with WoW
0: They had beer and football
Well, I agree, I'm not going to church... unless I start the church myself for tax breaks? Guess I shoulda added one more option :P
Q: I would go to Church if...
0: The priest sold me cocaine
0: I could smoke blunts in the pews
0: They had internet and were down with WoW
0: They had beer and football
Well, I agree, I'm not going to church... unless I start the church myself for tax breaks? Guess I shoulda added one more option :P
Thursday, September 18, 2008
This clock can kick your clock's ass
Even Stephen Hawking is amazed. This clock can clearly even kick his ass.
Here's the link:
http://www.guardian.co.uk/artanddesign/2008/sep/18/corpus.clock
There is a video, but apparently it doesn't like being embedded, so you'll just have to follow the link to see this badass clock in action. Don't worry, you can skip right over the words.
Edit: Here's a youtube video of the Chronophage in action, and its creator explaining it. The video in the link above is a bit clearer but they are not the same.
Here's the link:
http://www.guardian.co.uk/artanddesign/2008/sep/18/corpus.clock
There is a video, but apparently it doesn't like being embedded, so you'll just have to follow the link to see this badass clock in action. Don't worry, you can skip right over the words.
Edit: Here's a youtube video of the Chronophage in action, and its creator explaining it. The video in the link above is a bit clearer but they are not the same.
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
More girls selling virginity
Wow, its like a virginity closeout sale these days. This chick wants a million euro as opposed to the previous girl who just wants a million american. Clearly, this chick is smarter.... oh wait, probably not.
Here's the link:
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/europe/italy/2971511/Italian-model-plans-to-sell-virginity-for-1m-euros.html
"I don't know what it's like to have sex," she told the magazine, adding that if the man who bought her virginity was ugly then she would quickly get over it.
"If I don't like him I'll just have a glass of wine and forget about it," said the aspiring actress.
Hopefully economics will force the price of one's virginity down lower because even a million U.S. is too much for me.
The real shock of this article is that it's happening in another country.... and here I thought America was the only country that thought it was a reality tv show.
Here's the link:
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/europe/italy/2971511/Italian-model-plans-to-sell-virginity-for-1m-euros.html
"I don't know what it's like to have sex," she told the magazine, adding that if the man who bought her virginity was ugly then she would quickly get over it.
"If I don't like him I'll just have a glass of wine and forget about it," said the aspiring actress.
Hopefully economics will force the price of one's virginity down lower because even a million U.S. is too much for me.
The real shock of this article is that it's happening in another country.... and here I thought America was the only country that thought it was a reality tv show.
If it ain't murder its probably littering
This article is pretty hilarious. It involves a 60 year old japanese man, his sex doll, an autopsy and some littering laws.
Here's the link:
http://gizmodo.com/5051111/dumping-someone-is-hard-even-if-that-someone-is-a-sex-doll
Isn't making this guy step forward punishment enough? Do you really have to charge him 2000$ (or whatever the fuck they charge in Japan)
Here's the link:
http://gizmodo.com/5051111/dumping-someone-is-hard-even-if-that-someone-is-a-sex-doll
Isn't making this guy step forward punishment enough? Do you really have to charge him 2000$ (or whatever the fuck they charge in Japan)
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
Bottle Vs Can
New studies show that plastic bottles can possible give you heart disease and diabetes... but oh wait, even newer studies show that a chemical used to line cans can also give you heart disease. So, the question remains, do you drink your soda from a bottle or a can?
Fuck it, im getting a fountain :P
Here's the links:
Bottle: http://www.cnn.com/2008/HEALTH/09/16/bpa.safety.ap/index.html
Can: http://www.guardian.co.uk/society/2008/sep/16/health.research
Firstly, I love that this (the plastic article) most piognant example is the nalgene bottle. It's a nice big FUCK YOU to all those fuckers who think having a nalgene bottle is cool or helps the enviroment somehow. Again, FUCK YOU, nalgene bottles is just a bottle, same as any other bottle like the ones that come with the water you bought. Awesome.
Also, I love how nobody sees how just about everything causes heart disease. I think the soda in both the bottles and the cans probably invented heart disease... what the fuck is heart disease anyways?
Fuck it, im getting a fountain :P
Here's the links:
Bottle: http://www.cnn.com/2008/HEALTH/09/16/bpa.safety.ap/index.html
Can: http://www.guardian.co.uk/society/2008/sep/16/health.research
Firstly, I love that this (the plastic article) most piognant example is the nalgene bottle. It's a nice big FUCK YOU to all those fuckers who think having a nalgene bottle is cool or helps the enviroment somehow. Again, FUCK YOU, nalgene bottles is just a bottle, same as any other bottle like the ones that come with the water you bought. Awesome.
Also, I love how nobody sees how just about everything causes heart disease. I think the soda in both the bottles and the cans probably invented heart disease... what the fuck is heart disease anyways?
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